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Trying to remember the lines …

January 20, 2014

The first bit of the Bible that I ever heard and/or learned came from the book of Psalms.  My grandpa, Albert Boring, helped me to memorize the 23rd Psalm when I was only four or five years old. Granny and I would recite it together before we fell asleep at night.  It was totally ingrained in my mind/being.  I can still recite it — miraculously.

Many folks about my age (or older) will attest that the mind is just not as sharp as it used to be.  My boss once describe it as having “all the drawers in your file (brain) full and packed in there” so you can’t get any more in, until you clean out some of the files.  But I guess I’m a hoarder when it comes to my brain and I’m holding on to a lot. There’s a lot of clutter in there … but what if I need one of those memories, or bit of knowledge.  And obviously, stress and worry only serve as if the drawers have been emptied and all the stuff just crammed back in there with no organization or reason.

Today … as I have been trying to memorize lines for an upcoming play to which I’ve committed … and as my nature is that it has to be “perfect” — I’m feeling quite inept at the task of memorization and stressed that time is getting short.  On top of all that, I’m dealing with inside and outside issues that just make me feel … well … OLD, and unacceptable to say the least.  (As a side note, fortunately, the character I’m playing is in the same boat … so these tumultuous emotions may lend to the presentation)

So, to regroup, refresh and take a break from the “cramming” I opened up my devotional book and Bible.  It should come as no surprise that as always … Jesus is there waiting in the wings to give me appropriate cues.

SEEK MY FACE, and you will find more than you ever dreamed possible. Let me DISPLACE WORRY at the center of your being.” (Young, 2004, p. 20)

Some of those “inside and outside” issues I’m dealing with are simply a “natural state of affairs.”  Perhaps though, as I deduced from this day’s inspiration, I need to get a better understanding of the True “nature of things.”

God’s nature is to bless.  My nature is to receive with thanksgiving.”  This is a “true fit” and as Young states in this devotional, has been established before the foundation of the world.  My gratitude in receiving the nature of this “fit” is how I need/should/want to Glorify God.

Another Psalm that has always been a “go to” passage for comfort to me is Psalm 27.   Ironically, it just happens to be the scriptural reference for which this day’s devotion is based … specifically, Psalm 27:7-8: “Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice!  Have mercy also upon me, and answer me.  When You said, “Seek my face,” … My heart said to You, “Your face, Lord, I will seek.”

There’s just so much in this world … so many things that we tend to get ourselves involved with  … so many things that distract us, especially me, from the “ultimate goal” of “SEEKING GOD’S FACE.” 

Here I am with a set goal to perform well … to be “spot on” … striving for perfection, and to be able to handle all these things, and issues and commitments with GRACE.   ALL OF THESE, ANY OF THESE, are just “lesser goals” causing the Lord to “fade into the background” and what’s taking place “on stage” is ALL ABOUT ME!

But My God … My Lord is still there, watching and waiting in the wings — all while I’m “acting” as if I am all alone.  The irony is that while I am the one who has created this scenario … I am also complaining that I feel so “all alone.” 

It’s amazingly precious that my Heavenly Father does not throw up His Hands in total frustration with my arrogance. (I would!)  But instead, He’s right there, beckoning me to include Him in all my moments.  Especially those moments, which are just a simple part of nature, when I’m slipping (physically, mentally, emotionally — HORMONALLY). That I’m not handling it very well, certainly does not surprise My Creator, but He loves me none the less — and in spite of the fact that I’m not keeping up my end of the “true fit” deal and being thankful.

I’m very anxious! That’s why my mind feels so “crammed full” of “shtuff” right now.  I just need a little space … a little block of my brain … to hold the script/dialogue for a couple of weeks.  Truth is, I agreed to do this play because I was so longing for something creative; an outlet to express some artistry; a means of recapturing some passions that have laid dormant for too long.  And its hard work, but I don’t mind hard work.  I just want to do well … and I’m very anxious.

Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; (7), and the Peace of God which surpasses all understanding  will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

The final admonition from today’s devotion is “Let nothing dampen your search for Me.” (Young, 2004)

I guess that means tears too, huh?  Very well then … I can’t say a few more tears won’t be shed (after all, there’s a whole lot of junk going on in here).  But what I can say is … there’s not one reason that I can’t include Him in my moments.  I can and am and will be thankful for His Omnipresence.  I can and am and will be thankful for anticipated clarity from the peace and understanding.  I can and am and will remember that I am certainly not alone regardless of what I “think” the situation is.

Psalm 27:13-14, “I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.  Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord.”

Works Cited:

Young, S. (2004). Jesus Calling. Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

 

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